Lessons from the Lawn

This week I have completely neglected my house, particularly the outside of it. So last night I mowed the grass so that small children wouldn't get lost in it, and I weeded my front gardens.

And as I saw the college guys moving out of the house across the street, I got to thinking about now they've graduated and a new phase of life is starting. And how the future is just ripe with possibility. They have so much to offer this world, and so many exciting opportunities ahead of them.

And I saw them leaving, thought of the grad parties they had a few weeks ago, and how I had been outside mowing the lawn on that Friday night as well. A small thought crept in my head "I am the oldest 25-year-old I know." But then I snapped out of it, and reminded myself that I chose to buy a house and take on the responsibilities that come along with that. I reminded myself that I chose this simplistic life, not going out every weekend, choosing to cultivate this house into a home instead of always seeing the newest movie etc. And I challenged myself to be content on a night when I might rather be out to dinner than cutting the grass.

Then I moved on to weeding the front gardens. It had been about 2 weeks in between weedings (schoolwork had taken priority), and lots of little new weeds had sprung up. I sat down and began to pull them.
One at a time.
A monotonous task.
And one that allows my mind to wander and my heart to dream.

And suddenly, I stopped! I had planted some bulbs a few weeks back, and each week was checking to watch for their growth. Nothing. Nothing again. Weeks later, still nothing. But as I was weeding, I saw new growth. I saw these flowers pushing their way up through the soil. And my eyes filled. Because here were these plants that will blossom into beautiful flowers, but it took them a long time to get there. They had to push their way up through the dirt, unlike the other flowers I have. They had all these obstacles in their way, and they had to be disciplined and determined to get through. They knew they had a specific purpose, and that if they didn't grow and push, they wouldn't fulfill that purpose. And my eyes filled because I heard God say 'this is you. I know what you've had to push through, and what you are working through right now. It's OK if it takes you a little longer than everyone else. I love you, and I will see my works completed in you. Keep pushing onward to fulfill your purpose." It was amazing, because I see an ugly weed that should be pulled; he sees a beautiful flower on its way to blooming.

These little flowers are late bloomers. (ha, yes a pun was intended!!) But that doesn't minimize their value. They will actually bloom as my other flowers are wilting. They will sustain through the hottest part of the summer. They will bring beauty where there is none.

It encouraged me to keep searching, keep pushing, keep letting God lead my steps and not worry if others around me are getting there faster. My mom pointed out to me the other day that I'm not married. (wow, really? thanks Mom, I mean, how did I miss the fact I'm not married!?) Her point was, she didn't know why I wasn't. She sees me through eyes of love and they cover over all my faults.

And I told her that it just has taken me a long time to trust people, to want love, and to not my fear of letting someone in stop me from wanting marriage.

Like those flowers, I'm a late bloomer in that area. But I am getting there. Maybe one day love will be a part of my story.

And I smiled to myself because I am already loved. By my Father. And that is enough.